Welcome to my blog, I have hummed and haaa’d about putting pen to paper for the last 3 years. If I am to be completely honest (which is what I aim to be throughout this blog) I never thought I would still be here, still baby and belly-less. In my naive state of mind when our journey started I thought, oh no point in penning now, I’ll be preggers before long. Boy was I wrong. So here I sit staring down the barrel of IVF (again something I NEVER thought this would come to) and even as I write this there is a small part of me that thinks ‘oh but really I probably won’t end up doing IVF cause ill surely get pregnant next month’ I mean seriously have I learnt nothing!
My aim for this blog is to first and foremost create awareness about Asherman’s Syndrome (AS). Asherman’s Syndrome, also known as intrauterine adhesions, is a condition where the cavity of the uterus develops scar tissue (adhesions). The symptoms, extent of the adhesions, effect on the uterine cavity and clinical importance vary greatly. Unfortunately as the most common cause of AS is due to surgical procedures these two words are very reluctantly spoken by the medical profession, there-fore I feel the awareness around the syndrome is minimal. AS can also be caused by infections in the uterus but this I believe is not so common. I can only speak about my own experience with AS which I will do so in detail later on.
The second aim of this blog is to offer support. Infertility is a bitch and anyone who has suffered it for whatever length of time understands what a lonely place it is. I have found so much support on line with other AS sufferers from all over the world. Having people that truly understand how I feel because they feel it too has helped to no end. Sometimes my mind goes to the most ludicrous places and I start to think ‘oh yep this is it, insanity has finally found me’ then I chat to some of my AS ladies and I realize I’m not insane (well not entirely) and I’m not alone!
The third aim is double barreled, I aim to help those closest to me understand what my husband and I are going through and I aim to help me accept what I am going through. You would not think the words ‘Lucky’ and ‘Infertility’ could be used in the same sentence but they can. I am lucky for many things that have helped me get to today, I have the love of a good man. My husband is so very supportive, he knows what I am going through as he is going through it equally, okay so he doesn’t have the physical side effects but he has the emotional, no doubt about that. Do you have any idea how hard it is for a man to see the one he loves in pain and not be able to do anything about it? Well it’s hard and I see it written all over his face so often, as cheesy as this sounds he really is my rock. I am also extreamly lucky to have a supportive family and supportive friends, I want them to understand why I go into hibernation, why the roller-coaster of infertility is so bloody unpredictable and why it affects the way I live my life. I also want to use this blog to help me understand, I don’t want to feel ashamed or like I have failed. I don’t want to beat my body up for not working the way it should, my fertility and the hope of a easy conception was taken out of my hands with my first dilation and curettage (D&C) following my first miscarriage. I cannot hold myself responsible for this.
I will warn you now, during my blogging I will not shy away from gory details, I will write in detail regardless of how crass and gross it can be and for no other reason than to keep it real and honest. If your reading this then there is a very high chance you or someone close to you is going through a similar thing and I want you to be able to relate to me, I can also guarantee there will be the occasional f-bomb, sometimes there are just no other words that do a feeling or emotion justice!
You can keep up to date and read my weekly blogs under the Menu Tab. I hope that this will be of some help to you regardless of what brought you to my page, and if it’s not helpful let’s hope it’s entertaining, something good must come of this situation right!
Me Versus Ashermans 